The Journal
by Cascade of Rain
Summary: One day, by chance, Fang finds Max's journal. As he reads it, he slowly begins to develop feelings for her. AU, AH. A little rushed.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello FanFiction! This is my first Fanfiction, so DON'T take it easy on me. I want to hear all the crappy stuff, the good stuff. I always want to improve my writing, so give me CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Don't just downright hate my story; tell me WHY you hate it. Then, I can fix it. Anywayzas, this is an A/H, AU fanfiction. Max and Fang don't know each other. It's going to be like Harry Potter, with the 3****rd**** person, but having the character's thoughts. Hope you guys like it!**

"MAX! Where the hell are you? We have a few more pictures to take before we go back home!" a voice called.

Max looked up from her journal, her pen poised in the middle of a word, in the direction of the voice. She put down her pen, and sighed, rolling her brown eyes. This _was_ their first time at Cape Cod, she realized, but that didn't mean that Nudge had to document _every_ part of the trip. She had already filled up 2 memory cards for her camera! Still, Max had to humor her. Nudge was her best friend. Her _only_ friend.

Max put down her black and white journal, got up from the worn, weather-beaten bench, and brushed off the dirt and slivers of wood from her jeans. Her bright green hoodie was lying on the bench, and she picked it up and pulled it over her head, tousling her brown blonde streaked hair. She paused, wondering if she should fix it for the "photo shoot" that Nudge would soon be administrating, but decided not to, just to piss her off. She took off towards Nudge, the ocean roaring in her ears, unknowingly leaving her journal behind.

**This is the crappo line that I don't know how to make. But I will soon.**

Fang headed towards his favorite bench, the one that was right on the beach. As soon as he got there, he plopped down, closed his eyes, and let out his breath. He was so freaking _tired_ of all the drama with Lissa. Maybe, he thought, he should break up with her. It would clear up a lot of things. He added "break up with Lissa" to his mental Things to Do list. His hands wandered up and down the bench, and stopped when they felt something. Firm and rectangular. Like a book. He opened his eyes to see a normal black and white marble composition notebook innocently lying on the bench. He picked it up and flipped through the pages, noting the semi-neat handwriting. Definitely a girl's. Someone must have left it there. He'd look through it later, Fang decided, and try to find a way to contact the girl who owned it. He tucked underneath his jacket, having noticed the light drizzle sprinkling through the air. He closed his eyes again, trying to retrieve the peace he had once had, once upon a time.

A vibration cut through the air. Fang started, his eyes opening quickly, darting around the deserted beach. He realized quickly that it was only his phone and relaxed. He pulled it out, and read the text, from his brother.

_fang where r u? moms flipping out. get your butt over here before she passes out._

Fang sighed and slowly got up from the bench, sliding the phone back into his pocket with one hand, and making sure the journal didn't slip out from his jacket with the other hand. He ought to be rushing home, towards his mother, who had never felt right ever since the death of his father, but he took his own sweet time, trying to relish the last few seconds of peace he had before he would get caught up in the crazy rush of life. His life was like cars lining up on Black Friday, honking and shouting to each other. Fang took one last look at the grey ocean, and started to head home.

Maybe reading the journal would get his mind of things.

**SOOOO? How did you like it? It's kinda short, but the chapters will get longer. I actually didn't have a plan, just a basic idea, and I just went with the flow. Tell me how I can make it better! Can I get one review?**

**READ!**

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**You know you want to!**


	2. Chapter 2

**WOAH! 5 reviews when I only asked for one? That's awesome! Plus, with all the favorites and story alerts that went to my inbox, I'm more than happy! Thanks guys! **

**Anyhoodle, this chapter is dedicated to my 5 reviewers:**

**SomethingAboutDarkAngels (My very first reviewer! YAY!)**

**TMI (Ma bestie =))**

**Fang is awesome (Yes. Fang is **_**awesome**_**)**

**aalaal (Um. I don't have anything to say. Sorry. BUT THANK YOU ANYWAY!)**

**FlowerChild22 (Thanks for showing me how to make the line! I figured out how to do it. I think.)**

**Thanks for the suggestions too! I'm trying to work them in, so I can make my writing better!**

**I feel guilty, because I was going to type and post this chapter earlier, but my teachers assigned a crapload of homework. (And I **_**may**_** have been reading ****The City of Glass**** but you can't blame me. It's a good book!)**

**Disclaimer: I forgot it before. Do I seriously have to do it every time? This disclaimer will last for the whole story. I DON'T OWN ANYTHING. **

"C'mon Max! Smile! Work it baby! Make love to the camera!" Nudge shouted, moving all over the place, trying to catch a picture of Max staring stony faced at her in front of a rose garden. Nudge, realizing that this would be the best she would get, sighed and put down her camera. She knew that Max was all depressed because of the Incident, but seriously? Couldn't she crack a smile? Nudge sighed again, put her hands on her hips, and walked up to Max, ready to talk some sense into her. She had succeeded in becoming Max's best friend. Therefore, she could do _anything_.

"Okay _Max_," Nudge spat out, hoping to make Max feel guilty. "You are going to smile for one damn picture. You will uncross your arms. Most of all, you will _look like you are having fun_." Max stared at her for a couple of seconds and replied,

"No," Nudge started back at her for a couple of minutes, shocked. She had never really been refused before. Being an only child helped. This was Max though, and you had to be prepared when it came to Max. She overcame the fact that Max had refused to smile, mentally rolled her eyes, and quickly went through the different things she could do to trick Max into smiling. Her mind settled on one, and she cackled inwardly, rubbing her hands together like an evil scientist. She could almost picture the lightning and thunder rumbling in the distance.

"Please Maxi?" Nudge whimpered, her lower lip starting to jut out. Max, realization dawning across her face, quickly looked away. "Nudge…"

"Please?" Nudge repeated, her eyes growing wide, squinting slightly for a second, to produce the tears that might be required for the mission. Max glared at Nudge, but softened up as one lone tear drifted down her cheek. Nudge saw a flash of panic go through her eyes. She nearly smirked. Max was putty in her hands. Max gave one slow, painful nod before bursting,

"Oh come _on_ Nudge! Can't you manipulate me in some other way besides the stupid "I'm a lost puppy that nearly got run over by a truck, come save me" thing? Gosh! I wish you'd just put me in a headlock and blackmail me like a _normal _person would. I mean, honestly?" Nudge just gave a fleeting grin and skipped back to the spot where she had been taking pictures before.

"Okay Max! Take 2! Smile!" Max gave a forced grimace. Nudge gave a very exasperated sigh, and Max, realizing what might happen, dropped her grimace and gave a bright, false smile.

"That's it Max! You know what to do!" Nudge cooed.

"That. Was. _Hell_," Max sighed, plopping down on a nearby bench, running her hands through her hair. Nudge sat down next to her, grinning like the Cheshire Cat, and scrolling though the millions of pictures she had taken.

"It wasn't that bad was it? All you had to do was smile. Thinking of happy things helps. I mean, I would think of ice cream, movies, candy, dogs, Chuck Norris shooting a cat, because cats are absolutely _awful_. Have you _seen_ your neighbor's cat? That thing must be on steroids, it's freaking _huge_. It's like the size of those giant cotton candy sticks from the fair. Those were gigantic! We had to share one, and even sharing one almost made us explode! Oh! Remember the fair? Remember how we totally stalked the cute tea cup ride guy? He was so-," Max cut her off.

"_Nudge_. Would you shut up? You made me go through a photo shoot. I hate photo shoots. The _least_ you can do is let me have peace and quiet," Max snapped, her eyes closed, breathing very hard. Nudge frowned for a second, and then put away her camera.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, Max breathing deeply, and Nudge doing nothing. Finally, Nudge, bouncing with excitement and desperately wanting the silence to be pierced, forced out,

"Why don't you write in your journal? That way I won't be watching nothing, I'll be watching you." Max opened her eyes and raised one eyebrow –a talent Nudge wished she had- at her.

"Should I be creeped out? Anyways, Nudge, I think that's the smartest thing you've said all day," Nudge gave a satisfied smile and settled back onto the bench. Max bent over to reach her black backpack that was stuffed underneath the bench. She relaxed slightly, knowing that she would be able to soon write in her journal, pour out her thoughts and feelings into it. At first she'd thought the whole idea had been stupid. Now however,-.

Wait. Where had she put it? Max couldn't feel the firm edges of her notebook. Her hand searched blindly for a few minutes, then emerged from the backpack, trembling slightly. Max whipped her head towards Nudge, her face going pale. Nudge turned to Max with a smile on her face, ready to accept the praise of suggesting the genius idea. Her smile however, quickly faltered. Max stared at her, her face going white, then red with absolute rage, hands shaking, eyes darting back and forth between Nudge and her backpack, the old fire burning behind her eyes. Nudge had only seen her this mad since the Incident. She didn't even know what exactly had happened then.

"Nudge," Max managed, her voice short and emotionless. "Where the _hell_ is my journal?"

The door slammed as Fang walked into his house. The rain had stopped halfway home, but Fang made sure to clean the mud and wet leaves off the bottom of his shoes.

"Mom! Iggy! I'm home!" Fang yelled, tromping through the house, his footsteps echoing through the hall.

"Fang? Is that you?" a tired voice called out above him. Fang breathed in, set a smile on his face, and walked up the creaky stairs towards his mother's room. His mother was sitting up in bed, her face thin and the skin stretched over her cheekbones. Her brown hair had streaks of grey in it, more than before his dad had died, Fang noted. She seemed calm, but her light brown eyes showed worry and concern.

"You're back," she breathed a sigh of relief. "I was getting worried," Fang bit back a sarcastic remark. His mom didn't need that crap from him.

"I just took a walk on the beach Mom. It was fine. Where's Iggy?" he said.

"He went to the store to pick up some milk. He'll be back any second," she said, eyeing him carefully, noticing the strange rectangle underneath his jacket, wondering what secrets he was keeping from her.

"Cool. I'm gonna go to my room. Do you need anything?" Fang said, trying to change the subject. His mom's eyes snapped back to his face and she smiled warmly.

"Nothing at all. Just some sleep. I'm sure I'll be fine in the morning," Fang nodded and started to turned around and started to head towards the hallway, but his mother's voice stopped him halfway.

"Fang," he turned around. "you'll be careful, right?" Fang tried to smile.

"I will Mom," he turned and headed towards his room, his mother watching sadly.

Fang shut his bedroom door behind him carefully, and flopped onto his bed. He stared at his dark grey walls, and took the composition notebook for where it had been sandwiched against him. He gazed at it. It was simple, just a marble composition notebook. There was no name on the front, nor any other way to identify the owner. Fang sighed, wondering why he had chosen to go through the trouble of doing this. Why couldn't he have just left it there? He adjusted his body so he was sitting up, and opened the journal.

A normal picture fell out of it onto his lap. A picture of a girl. A beautiful girl, who had brown hair with blonde streaks, pushed back with a black headband. A heart shaped face. Milky chocolate brown eyes that seemed to swirl with different colors and emotions. Pink, full lips curved into a slight smile. Fang gaped at the picture, wondering how someone could be so pretty. She was better than _Lissa_. Lissa, who was the prettiest girl in school. Lissa, who had every boy wrapped around her finger (except for Fang). He numbly wondered how many boyfriends this girl had in the past. He shook his head, clearing out any thoughts, and directed his eyes towards the first page. In neon green handwriting, was one sentence.

_My name is Max._

Fang frowned. Max? Wasn't that a boy's name? Maybe it was a guy's journal, he guessed, and the pretty girl was his girlfriend. Then again, the handwriting was way too neat to be a guy's. Maybe he had unnaturally neat handwriting. Fang's frown grew deeper. Max couldn't possibly be a girl's name. Could it?

**Ta Da!**

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	3. Chapter 3

**10 reviews? I AM BLOWN AWAY! My oh so fabulous reviewers are: Emilie 12, anonymous reviewer that had no name, but was signed Anastasia, skybaby101, SomethingAboutDarkAngels, aalaal, Aria, maximumrideluvr, FlowerChild22, I'mOutYourWindow, PurpleUnicornK, and TMI.**

**You guys are so sweet :D. I love you ALL in the non creepy-non stalkerish way. Special thanks to my reviewers that came back a second time!**

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**Most of you wanted a longer chapter, so I did my best with this one! Enjoy! **

**WEEEEEE! LINE BREAK!**

**.com/watch?v=Z3ZAGBL6UBA&ob=av3e**

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><p>Nudge stared at Max, trembling slightly, wondering what she might have done. She had <em>never<em> seen Max this angry, except after the Incident.

"W-what?" she stuttered, praying that Max wouldn't kill her. She decided to bask in the last few moments of her precious life. Memories, she thought. Think of memories. The hot guy at school that had winked at her when she was walking out of Biology. The one time when the cafeteria had served red velvet cupcakes. Playing Sandy in the school's production of _Grease_. The one time that Brigid-.

"I said, _where the freaking hell is my journal Nudge?"_ Max spat, her brown eyes blazing with anger. Nudge gulped. She knew that Max's journal held a very special place in Max's heart. She had told many things to the journal that she hadn't told to Nudge, especially after what had happened to Ella. She had even rejected her mom for the journal. With the journal gone, Nudge knew that all hell was going to break loose.

"I d- don't know Max," she mumbled, looking down at her hands. Millions of thoughts were blazing through her mind. The journal. Max's journal. The one she thought of as a best friend. A better best friend than Nudge, most likely. The journal. The journal was _gone_. Max's best friend was _gone. _A spark of hope blazed in her chest. Maybe, just _maybe_, Max would be able to forget about it and Nudge would be her number one best friend. Maybe-

A complete silence fell upon the air. Nudge looked up from her perfectly glossed fingernails.

What she saw shocked her. Max's face was completely white. So white, she looked like a corpse. Nudge thought that for a split second that Max really had died from shock, but the rapid pulse at the base of her throat told her otherwise.

"Max?" she said tentatively.

Max looked up from her hands, straight at Nudge. Her eyes, which were usually swirling with emotion and colors, were still. Plain brown, more boring than mud. Even though they were empty, Nudge found it hard to look into them. They had become eyes of a heartless being in mere seconds.

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><p>Everything that had happened to Max in the past few years had been brutal on her family. The story was long and complicated, and Nudge had been with her every step of the way.<p>

Nudge had moved to the small town of Chatham in second grade. On the first day, she had met Max, a bright eyed little girl with her front two teeth missing and her brown curls tied back into pigtails. They had instantly become friends, and Nudge had met her parents, Jeb and Valencia, and Max's little sister, Ella.

In the middle of fourth grade, Jeb and Valencia got a divorce. Nudge remembered the day perfectly. It had been a snowy January day, the kind of day that blew ice into your eyes and made you toes numb, even in high insulated boots. A Wednesday, to be even more precise. Nudge had taken the bus to school alone, wondering where the heck Max was. During Social Studies, as soon as she had taken out her notebook, the door burst open. In walked Max, her eyes red rimmed and her nose running. She kept wiping it on the sleeve of her parka, leaving dark trails on the fabric.

Max had handed a white slip of paper to their teacher, who read it quickly and gave Max a sympathetic smile.

Max hung her coat and backpack in her cubby, took out her books, and slumped to her seat, which just so happened to be next Nudge's. The teacher had yet to figure out that Max and Nudge were the best of friends. Nudge opened her mouth to ask her what was wrong when the teacher opened _her _mouth to start talking about the Ice Age, which was very appropriate for the weather.

The room became silent for a while, except for the scratching of pencil against notebook paper, the teacher droning on and on about the Ice Age, and the squeaking of the bright yellow chairs against the linoleum floor. All of a sudden the sound of ripping paper surfaced through the air. The teacher paused, and looked up at Max, who was holding up a piece of paper which she had evidently taken from the back of her notebook. Max gave her an apologetic smile, which seemed like a grimace.

The teacher resumed, and Max started writing, but this time on the piece of paper that she had ripped.

It landed on Nudge's desk in a crumpled ball. She had glanced up at the teacher, still droning on about the Ice Age, and uncrumpled it. Scrawled in neon green ink, Max's signature color, was

_Mom and Dad are getting a divorce. Don't reply. TTYAR_

TTYAR stood for "Talk To You At Recess". It was part of their acronym language, which was written down in a notebook.

Nudge looked at Max in disbelief, who was staring straight ahead at the blackboard. As usual, a million thoughts were running through her head. _Jeb? Valencia? Divorce? What about Max? Ella?_

She couldn't concentrate throughout the whole class. The word "divorce" was chanting in her head, like a bad rap song.

The bell rang, and Nudge's head came up from where it had been resting on her arm.

"Ok class, we're staying inside for recess today, because of the snow. You may play board games or talk quietly," the teacher said, emphasizing the last word.

Nudge jumped up from her seat, nearly knocking over chair. Max walked over to her, took her elbow, and smoothly started walking towards the front of the room, where the teacher had sat down to grade papers.

"Hi Miss Burgund," Max said in an angelic voice. "I _really_ have to go the bathroom and I just might pee in my pants in the middle of the hallway. If Nudge, the All Wonderful Saviour of My Bladder comes with me, then that just might not happen,"

The teacher stared at Max with one eyebrow raised, a small smile playing across her lips, and gave a curt nod. Max's grip on Nudge's elbow tightened as they walked out of the class.

As soon as the door shut carefully behind them, Max turned to Nudge, new formed tears sprouting from her eyes. The full on waterfall came, and soon Max was blubbering like a baby.

"Nudge," she sobbed. "Mom and Dad are getting a divorce. They told me and Ella this morning. They said they were having problems. I've even seen Dad take out the beer bottles. The ones he swore to _never ever touch_," She hiccupped.

For the second time in her life, Nudge could not speak (the first from when she got her puppy, Charlie).

Max had confided in her that Jeb had had a drinking problem, but he had stopped a few years ago. Nudge had barely known what a drinking problem was, but she had understood that it was serious.

Nudge also hadn't realized how much of an impact the divorce would have on Max. The whole family withdrew from the public eye after Jeb moved out. Max became distant, often staring out into space, her expression thoughtful.

She seemed more grown-up too. Instead of playing House, she dedicated her free time to helping her mother. Even though Nudge knew that her mom needed the help, she couldn't help but feel sad that she had lost her formerly fun friend.

Max became a totally different person after what happened to Ella. A year ago Jeb had contacted them, and wanted to have Ella and Max over at his apartment. Max had come back to the apartment, after getting milk and bread from the corner store, to find Ella bloodied and unconscious. She was still in the coma today. Max had gone hysterical, locking herself in her room, crying her eyes out, and rereading _Harry Potter_ over and over again, until her mom finally went to her room, a blank journal in her hand, to talk to her. Max poured her heart out to the journal. Nudge saw write in it for nearly an hour every day, replaying thoughts and events she never told Nudge. She had rarely left Ella's side. She was there after school, everyday, staring at Ella's peaceful face, listening to the _beep. Beep. Beep _of her steady heartbeat, the one thing that showed that Ella was still truly alive.

The flashbacks poured through Nudge's head like a river breaking through a dam. It took her mom month's to convince Max to come to Cape Cod, as a vacation. Now, her journal, the one thing that wouldn't judge her past, was gone.

They had to find it.

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><p>Fang stared at the journal page in confusion. Seriously? Max could not be a girl's name. What kind of person named a girl Max anyway? Fang decided to go with the most logical answer. This "Max" was a boy (with unnaturally neat handwriting), and the beautiful girl was his girlfriend. The girlfriend that Fang would kill to meet. Not because she was beautiful, because there seemed to be something guarded behind her eyes, a secret that she was dying to tell.<p>

She'd be like a breath of fresh air compared to the other phonies at school.

Fang then realized that if he read on, then he'd figure out the gender of this person. He mentally slapped himself for being so stupid, and turned the page.

More green writing covered half a page. Fang chuckled silently to himself. Whoever this person was, they sure liked the color green. He took a deep breath and began to read.

_ Ok. So here goes. I think this journal is stupid. Mom gave it to me so someone can "understand what I'm feeling without judging". But I'm pretty sure you can't understand what I'm feeling. Just saying._

_ I guess you want to know everything about me. I'm not gonna be one of those stupid girls who write about their appearances so someone else can take the journal slash diary and conjure up a mental picture. So I'm just going to enclose a picture._

_ Anywho. Journal wants to know about me. My name is Max. I AM A GIRL_._ Get the stupid fact straight. Just because my name is Max doesn't mean I'm a boy._

_ Whatever. So I'm 16 years old. Chikka-chikka no. I'm not having the time of my life. I haven't even gotten my permit, let alone my license. Mom says that living in a town where there are like zero cars makes us drive reckless._

Fang's heart stopped beating for a second. Then it went back to the steady _thump. Thump. Thump_.

Max was a girl. A gorgeous girl. A girl that probably held secrets like a treasure chest. A gorgeous girl. A girl that was _his age_.

Fang felt incredibly lucky. However, the happiness deflated quickly. He couldn't help but feel like a stalker. Reading someone's private thoughts. How creepy was that? Then he realized that the only way to contact the girl was to look through her journal. Simple. Her contact info was probably in the first few pages. He decided to read on.

_I don't agree with her. So. Right. 16 years old and I'm 5'4". Isn't that absolutely wonderful? Sam still keeps teasing me, even though he knows I can break his wrist in two seconds flat. I let him though._

A strange feeling surged up in his stomach as Fang read the part about the kid named Sam. A _boy_ named Sam. He couldn't possibly jealous right? He didn't know either one of them at all! No, he was probably just hungry.

_My parents are divorced. They divorced when I was in 4__th__ grade. Whoop de freaking doo. I don't need your stupid sympathy card. Ah damn it. I keep thinking the journal is real._

_I admit, it is a nice change. At least you don't talk back, like Nudge. She DRIVES ME CRAZY every day!_

_But she did help me through everything that happened. And I never said thank you. Oh crap. That's why she's all moody. I thought it was PMS._

Fang wondered what the "everything that happened" situation was. And who was this Nudge? A friend? If it was her real name, Max had a thing for strange names. He hoped "Fang" was no exception.

_Note to Self. Say thank you to Nudge. She deserves it._

_I have a little sister, Ella. She's two years younger than me, and she's in a coma. A coma, which she slipped into two weeks ago._

_I'd gone to get stuff from the grocery store at the corner down from Jeb's (my dad) apartment. _

_When I got back, there was Ella, on the bloodstained floor, her eyes closed. Jeb, looking at her with horrified eyes. I thought she was dead. My little sister, dead. _

_So I did the whole thing with calling the ambulance. I called my mom, and went with Ella._

_She slipped into a coma an hour later._

_I'd never thought that Jeb would do such a thing. He was the type of dad that would take us to fairs, and pony rides, buy us toys and take us to Disneyworld. _

_He barely ever yelled, and doing this to Ella was as good as killing me. Elle-belle is my best friend. If he took her away, I'd kill him._

_I knew he used to drink, but stopped when he met Mom. When he started up again, all I could think was _weren't we good enough?

_I think Jeb was shocked too. He couldn't think that he'd ever raise his voice against Ella and me, let alone his hand._

_Jeez. Look at that. I don't think I've ever thought such deep thoughts before. That's insane._

_Well journal, I have to eat dinner. My stomach is calling. I think I'm feeling (dare I say it?) a bit better. Who knew that writing in an inanimate object would make me feel like a little ray of sunshine?_

_Except I'm not a ray of sunshine. I'm a spot of darkness. But hey. Maybe I'll feel like a ray of sunshine eventually._

_That'll be the day Ella wakes up._

_I know she will. I believe in her._

_Maybe I'll write again tomorrow._

_Who knows?_

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><p>Fang stared at the page in disbelief. He had no idea that someone in this world was going through a living hell. A girl's best friend, her <em>sister<em>, in a coma. It was hard to believe that such bad things were happening to someone, a living, breathing person.

He looked up at the digital clock on his bedside, and saw, that to his shock, and hour and passed since he had started reading the journal. He had always been a slow reader though.

Fang got up from bed and stretched his limbs, which were numb from sitting in the same position for a long time.

He looked out the window. Darkness had already fallen, and the streetlamps were on.

Fang opened his bedroom door and peeked into his brother's room, which was right next to his.

Iggy was fast asleep on his bed, even though it was only six.

Fang smiled, and went downstairs to look for some food. He rubbed his eyes, and when he looked at them, he was surprised to see them slightly wet.

Had he been crying? Fang never cried. Not even when he had broken his arm. He'd only cried when his father had died.

His mind flashed back to the journal. There had been tear stains scattered throughout the page. He knew why.

But he honestly couldn't believe that some stranger's story was making him cry. When he'd read sad books in English, he didn't cry (though every single person did. Even the boys).

This girl's story was real though. Very real.

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><p><strong>So you learned more about Max's past.<strong>

**Whaddya think?**

**You have to listen to "One and Only" by Adele! It's such a beautiful song. I was listening to it as I was typing this chapter. **

**The link at the top is not for that song. It's for another awesome song. HEEHEE!**

**I think I FINALLY found out how to put the lines in. :D**

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	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks too: PurpleUnicornK, TMI, RIAT, Readingworn99, Something About Dark Angels, Paper Aeroplanes, FlowerChild22, Unicorn-Avian Girl, ****Eptasticawesomeriffic, maxi's chocolate chippies, and my blog is better than yours.**

**Vous êtes génial! (I used Google Translate for that, even though I probably could have figured it out, since I take French and all).**

**ENJOY!**

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><p>Nudge gazed at Max, who was still staring right back at her. The world came crashing back, and she jumped.<p>

_They had to find her journal._

"C'mon Max!" Nudge yelped. She grabbed Max's arm and pulled her forcefully from the bench. It was getting dark out, but a few lights were flickering on. Nudge patted the pocket of her North Face to make sure her flashlight was still there. It was. _Good._

Max started, and looked up at Nudge, traces of immediate anger gone from her eyes.

"What the hell Nudge? What's going on? Can you please leave me to wallow in misery?"

Nudge almost let out a smile, but caught it just in time. Even though the real Max was back, these were serious times.

"_We_ are going to find your journal. Together. We'll retrace your steps from this bench, to the car. Now come _on_." She tightened her hold on Max's arm and started dragging back towards the rose garden, the scene of the dreaded photo shoot, but was stopped by Max, who dug her heels into the ground. Nudge grasped at the air wildly, her balance lost, until her hand found Max's face.

Max wrenched it away. "Hang on. Since when do you care about my journal? I thought it annoyed to the depths of hell that I'd abandon you at the theater or at Mickey D's to go write in it."

Nudge scoffed. "I care about your journal!"

Max raised one eyebrow (a skill Nudge wished she had). Nudge let out a frustrated sigh. "Ok. _Fine_. So maybe I don't care about you journal. I don't care when we go to Mickey D's either, so you're wrong about that fact. But I do care about you Max, and I want you to be happy. So please, let me find your journal and you won't spiral into depression."

Max stared at her for a moment, examining her eyes to see if she was telling the truth. Nudge's dark brown eyes boasted worry, and surprisingly, a bit of sadness and anger.

Sadness? Anger? Why was Nudge sad and angry?

_Duh_.

It hit her. Of course she was sad and angry! She didn't like how Max spent so much time with her journal!

_Double Duh._ Max remembered the note to self she had first written in her journal. She had never done it! She couldn't believe herself. After everything Nudge had done for her, she couldn't say a mere "thank you". Max started to open her mouth-

And was cut off by Nudge.

"Come _on_ Max! It'll be pitch black out soon if we don't start to find your journal! Let's MOVE!" She promptly started dragging Max again.

Max let her.

* * *

><p>So they looked. <em>Everywhere<em>. The duo went to Max's mom's car, which although they found many old Spider-Man comics, they did not find Max's journal.

They went to the hotel room, which overlooked the beach. Max's mom, who had been lying on the bed, reading _Pride and Prejudice,_ had looked up in alarm when Max had burst into the room, her face steadily getting whiter with each minute of unlucky searching.

"What's wrong girls?"

"Nothing Mrs. Martinez," Nudge soothed.

Max looked up from looking underneath the mauve comforter.

"My journal is gone."

Valencia tried to recover from her shock. Max's journal, was, as everybody said, her best friend. To lose your best friend was impossible. No one lost their best friend.

"Well are you sure? Did you check everywhere?"

Max exploded.

"Of course I checked everywhere! Do you think I'm stupid enough to not look everywhere for my journal? My-"her voice trailed off as she saw the slightly terrified look on her mother's face.

Valencia knew she should have understood how Max was feeling. Her best friend (or was it BFFL, as teenagers called it these days?) was gone. She was bound to be upset and ready to fly off her rocker. Valencia tried to hide her emotions as much as possible, but still. She couldn't stop the one bit from leaking into her eyes.

Max felt bad. She was never good with emotions, and when she saw the slight hurt in her mom's eyes, she didn't know what to do. She felt uncomfortable.

Then, it hit her.

_Apologize._

Apologize, just what she had never done to Nudge before. Sorry that Max had made her feel disregarded, even though all she'd wanted was her space.

She truly felt her remorse now.

Max made another mental note. To apologize to Nudge, ASAP.

But first, she had to apologize to her own mother.

Max walked over to where her mother had stood up in bed. She slowly put an arm around her back. It hung loosely, ready to pull away.

Valencia turned her head towards Max, startled. Max, putting an arm around someone?

Max took a deep breath and mumbled something.

"What was that sweetheart?" Valencia said, hardly breathing. Could it be? Could Max really be-?

"I'm sorry!" Max blurted out.

Valencia and Nudge stared at Max, their mouths wide open. Even Max herself looked surprised. She dropped her gaze down to her lap, where her hands where folded primly.

Nudge closed her mouth, then opened it again, as if she wanted to speak, then closed it again.

Finally she found the words.

"Oh em gee! Did you just say sorry Max? No freaking way! This is unbelievable!" She blabbered on and on.

Max turned towards her mother. Nudge voice seemed to be sent to the back of her head.

"I'm sorry," she began, choosing her words carefully. "I yelled at you. I shouldn't have gotten mad. I know you were just trying to help."

Valencia grinned.

"I know you knew. I accept your apology, but I'm just glad you can say sorry!" They smiled at each other for a few minutes, then Nudge's voice once again broke through the barriers.

"I know, I know, this scene is very heartwarming, but Max? If you want to find your journal before some pelican eats it, then get your buttocks off that bed and let's move!"

Max leaped up as if she had been electrocuted.

"Crap! I almost forgot! Thanks Nudge!"

She gave her mother a quick hug and ran out the hotel door.

Nudge looked at Valencia, smiling slightly.

"Gosh damn it. She seems to be full of emotions and surprises today doesn't she?"

Valencia nodded and smiled back.

"Yeah… well, that's just how some people are right Nudge?" Nudge bobbed her head in agreement.

"Absolutely. I'm gonna go now. I've gotta go find Max, see if she got run over by a car in her frenzy to find her journal. I'll see you later, for dinner?"

"9 'o' clock, since you want to look for her journal. I'll order some pizza," Valencia replied, and turned back to her book.

Nudge walked out into the hallway and looked around. Max was nowhere in sight. Knowing that she wouldn't leave without her, Nudge headed in the direction of the front door.

Nudge remembered something and stopped in her tracks.

_Max said thank you. To me. Finally. _

She grinned and resumed walking.

* * *

><p>Fang looked through the kitchen window, gazing at the moonlight washing across the wooden deck floor.<p>

Moonlight was a funny thing. Fang had always thought how strange it was how that during the night, when everything was dark, that there was one thing in the sky that gave off light. A funny white light.

The Max girl was a funny girl too.

Not "Oh, that was funny, hahaha". A strange funny. She seemed tough on the outside.

Like all tough people, Fang was sure that Max was a softie on the inside.

Just like those macho sumo wrestlers and boxers that broke down at the sight of an abandoned puppy.

He was sure that she was like those Lindt truffles. A hard shell, that when you broke, the inside melted, and "so did your heart", as according to the label. Hopefully she was like the red ones. They were his favorite.

Wait. What was he talking about? How could she be like the red ones? Fang had no idea what she tasted like.

He imagined himself taking a bite out of the girl's arm and snickered to himself.

_Hmm. Needs a bit more cinnamon, that arm, and it's good to go!_

Sometimes his thinking surprised himself.

He took a plastic container off pasta from the night before out off the fridge and dumped it on a plate. As he poured some spaghetti sauce over it, his thoughts drifted towards the picture of Max.

_Beautiful._ _Just beautiful._

He wondered, as he put the plat in the microwave, for the umpteenth time whether she had a boyfriend.

Gorgeous.

That pretty hair. He wondered how it felt. He imagined pushing his fingers through it, softer and smoother than silk, running through is fingers like liquid.

Those pretty eyes. Brown as those delicious Lindt truffles, but looking at them was better than eating those truffles.

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

The announcement that his food was ready broke through his thoughts. Fang shook his head.

Then he realized what his thoughts had been.

Gosh he was so creepy! A stalker too, thinking about Max like that, gazing at her picture.

He decided to go read more of the journal to find contact information as soon as could, so that when the met (hopefully), he could get her number, and think about less creepily.

Because, you know, he would have her number, so therefore, they would be friends.

Fang scarfed down his food and bounded up the stairs to his room.

The journal was still lying where it had been, on the bed. He lay down again, and picked up the journal, flipped to where he had left off, and began to read the neon green writing.

* * *

><p><em>Whoopdefreakingdoo. I'm back, Journal. <em>

_That's because Mom locked me in my room to so I could "get in touch with my feelings". _

_I don't know how she did it, seeing how my room locks from the inside, but that's the number one rule kids need to learn these days._

_Don't underestimate their mother._

_I visited Ella. Everything was normal. At least, that's what the doctors said._

_Normal._

_Everything's normal._

_Except of course, for the fact she's in a FREAKING COMA._

_Gosh kill me now._

_Wait, never mind. Don't kill me. I've gotta be there when Ella wakes up._

_Which I know she will._

_Don't underestimate Ella._

_She's the strongest person I know._

_The day she wakes up will be the best day of my life, I swear._

_On a happier note, I got a new bicycle._

_I know Mom got it to get my mind of off things, but it's still pretty beast._

_Neon green (my favorite color, duh) with purple stripes. I even got that glow-in-the-dark paint for the wheels, just like that BlackBerry person._

_I'll be riding around town in the middle of the night._

_Sam got some too. We can ride around together._

There was that name again. Sam. Fang's insides boiled.

Hold it. _What was he thinking?_ He barely knew this girl!

He finally decided that it wasn't jealously. The pasta must have gone bad.

Even though it had been made yesterday.

Maybe the refrigerator settings were too warm. He made a mental note to raise the temperature.

_Sam's been great throughout this whole thing. Batter say thank you to him, as well as Nudge. Crap! I forgot to say thank you to Nudge. I'll do it tomorrow. definitely.  
><em>

_Dinner time again Journal. Be back again soon, hopefully._

_Signing off,_

_Max_

* * *

><p>She had drawn a wing coming out on either side of her name, as if her name was flying.<p>

That's probably what Max wanted to do. Fly off into the sky and never come back until Ella woke up.

Fang shook his head.

Authors weren't the only people who had deep thoughts.

* * *

><p><strong>Meh. Not my best. I wanted to get this chapter up sooner, but I got writer's block, and I just got too lazy. I'll do better next time. I hope you all had a Happy Holidays and a safe, Happy New Year! I went to my cousin's for all of break, so I that's another reason I couldn't get this chapter up before Christmas.<br>**

**It's strange, writing those deep thoughts. Cause you know, I don't have that many deep thoughts. =)**

**So, what do you think about the world ending this year crap? I think that's all BS. I believe in God, so if he created if this world, why would he destroy it? Seems like a helluva lot of hard work going down the drain.**

**Review, tell me about your New Year, and tell me about your favorite Lindt chocolates. (I like the dark chocolate ones too)** **=D**

**Sm:)le! (That's my sign off. Don't you dare steal it).**


	5. Chapter 5

**Let's Rawk Giants! Woot Woot!**

**luvin'-music: I hope you've tried the Lindt truffles. They're so yummy =)**

**TMI: He was eating around sixish. M****ax and Fang live in the same time zone.**

**Sorry this one's so short. I wanted to get it up fast.**

* * *

><p>Max waited outside the hotel, bouncing on her toes, her hands stuffed into the pockets of her purple North Face. She let out a breath, aiming it at her nose in a fruitless attempt to make it warm. It was getting colder and colder, and in Max's opinion, it was too cold for November. Then she remembered that they were in Cape Cod, which was near the ocean, which meant cold.<p>

Damn the cold.

Max stopped bouncing, and instead, started tapping her foot impatiently.

Where the hell was Nudge?

Max sure hoped that she wasn't having a heart to heart with her mom. Mom was a vet, not a therapist that handed over Kleenex while Nudge wailed on and on about her latest breakup.

Which, interesting fact here, and been with a guy named Bert.

Nudge usually had better taste, and almost always settled for a guy on the football team, not some kid who was into World War II and M1 10 snipers.

Max shook her head to clear of the strange thoughts as Nudge bounded down the cracked steps of the hotel, looking cheery despite the situation.

"Okay! I'm ready! Let's continue on our fabulous adventure to find your beloved journal!" Nudge declared a huge smile on her face.

They started walking towards the section of the beach they had had the photo shoot while Max stared incredulously at Nudge.

"Are you high? What's with the happy face? What took you so long?" Max questioned. Nudge rolled her eyes.

"I figured that you might need a little cheering up since you lost your journal."

Max raised her eyebrow.

"If I want to be happy, then I would like to be distracted from the fact that I lost my journal, ok?"

Nudge nodded mutely and added the fact to her mental notebook.

"You never told me why you were super late to begin our quest," Max said. Nudge grinned.

"I was talking to Dr. M!"

Max sighed.

"Seriously Nudge? Couldn't you wait until we got home and you could talk with your therapist about Bert? Did you have to-,"

"We were actually talking about YOU," Nudge interrupted.

Max stopped walking, apparently stunned, and looked at Nudge. Nudge stopped too and looked right back at Max.

"Why the hell where you talking about me?" Nudge winked and resumed walking. She was several feet away when Max finally caught up to her senses and jogged to catch up with Nudge.

"C'mon! Why were you talking about me?"

Nudge turned and looked at Max, her eyes guarded. Max was surprised. She could normally read Nudge like a book, but this time no emotion slipped through.

"_You_, Miss Martinez, do _not_ need to know why we were talking about you. That is _our_ business. Plus, we weren't having a long, drawn out conversation. I just said a couple of things, your mom said a couple of things, including that we had to be back at the hotel at nine, and I walked out. Happy?"

Max huffed in annoyance as they continued walking.

"If you're not gonna tell me then I guess I am." Nudge chuckled.

"Good choice."

They continued the walk in silence.

* * *

><p>"I can't believe it," Max said in the same emotionless voice that had scared Nudge before. "My journal isn't here. Where the hell can it be?"<p>

They were back on the beach where the photo shoot had taken place, Max's journal nowhere in sight.

"Okay. It's okay," Nudge replied soothingly, trying to stay calm, when really, her heart was beating as fast as a race car in her chest. "We've just got to retrace your steps, okay? Just tell me when and where you last wrote in your journal, and we'll go look there. Unless, of course, it was at your house. Then we'll have to-."

"I was sitting on a bench, kind of close to the beach," Max interrupted. Nudge went silent, ears craning for the tidbit of information. "I was writing until you called me for the stupid photo shoot. I put it down on the bench, to put on my hoodie and-"Max stopped mid-word and turned towards Nudge, her mouth wide open.

"_The bench near the beach! _That's where I left it! I must have forgotten about taking it with me while I was putting on my hoodie! C'mon Nudge. Let's go!" She dashed off in the direction of the beach, only skidding to a stop when she realized that Nudge wasn't right behind her. Max sprinted to where Nudge was standing, her lips spread into a mischievous smile. Max stared at her.

"Why are you standing there? Don't you realize that I've possibly found the location of my journal?" Max demanded.

Nudge's smirk grew wider.

"Seriously. Why are you smiling?"

Nudge was suddenly overcome with giggles.

"You… lost… your… train…of… thought… while… putting… on… your… hoodie?" Nudge wheezed out in between giggles.

Max raised her eyebrow.

"Okay, I don't a great memory span, so what? Now let's go!" She grabbed Nudge's arm and pulled her towards the beach.

* * *

><p>Max stared at the empty bench in pure horror.<p>

There was no black and white composition book anywhere in sight.

She collapsed on the bench and her head fell onto her hands, while Nudge stared her.

A tear slipped down her cheek and Nudge sat down next to her.

Max's head fell onto Nudge's shoulder and she started sobbing. Nudge hid her shock by soothingly rubbing her back and humming in sympathy

"What am I gonna do Nudge?" Max hiccupped. "All my thoughts and stuff were in the journal! Now, somebody's probably found it and they're reading it right now! What am I going to do?"

Nudge looked out over the ocean, the waves crashing against the sand.

"I don't know Max," she finally replied. "I don't know."

* * *

><p>They stood there for a while, until Max took her head off of Nudge's shoulder and gave her a hug. Nudge looked at her in surprised.<p>

"Thanks Nudge," Max said, her voice slightly muffled.

Nudge's surprise grew.

"Thanks for what?"

"For everything," Max continued. "Thanks for helping me through this crap and the stuff with Ella. I really mean it. I'm sorry for not saying it before."

Nudge stared in disbelief, and then her face broke out into a grin.

"No problem. And thanks for saying thanks."

She returned the hug.

* * *

><p>Fang lay on his bed for a while, thinking.<p>

But this time, he wasn't thinking about Max.

He was thinking about his dad.

His dad had been the best guy in the world. He had played baseball with Fang and Iggy, bought them ice cream, cheered them on at their games, and so much more.

Being married to their mom, former Miss Massachusetts, they had seemed like the couple sent from heaven.

Their mom made cookies and baked goods, while their dad was the all around cool guy.

Their life was perfect, until that one day.

It had been the 4th of July, this year. They'd been coming home from the spectacular fireworks show, when a drunk driver had rammed into the driver's side of the car.

Fang, Iggy, and their mom had made out with a few scrapes, but their dad had been killed on impact.

They coped with the loss in different ways.

Mom took to bed, sleeping and crying to herself to sleep.

Iggy threw himself into baseball and his studies.

Fang developed his emotionless wall, a thing that guarded his raw emotions from the loss of his dad's death.

It had scared his mother the first time he had put it on, but she eventually got used to it.

Fang rolled over so he was lying on his back, remembering the gentle guitar strums that his dad had played when Fang and Iggy were getting ready to sleep.

It was the little moments like those that hurt him the most, the ones that made him want to curl up and cry.

He missed his dad _so, so_ much.

Fang wondered what Max would have thought about his dad.

Wait. Where had that come from?

Fang couldn't help himself, his thoughts wondered off to Max.

He wondered what the beautiful girl would think of his dad, his mom, Iggy.

Himself.

He couldn't help himself, again. He wanted to meet her, to see what she was like, to see whether she would like him as much as he suddenly liked her.

Most people, like Iggy, thought that love at first sight was pure crap.

Even though he'd never said it himself, he believed in it.

The thought of having an irresistible attraction with someone just when they met yearned to him. To be in love with someone who didn't know your scarred past and faults.

But he didn't love Max, that was plain old creepy. He just liked her very much. He wanted to be her friend.

There was something about her written self that made him want to learn more about her.

But unfortunately, even though it was 7 'o' clock, he was tired and wanted to go sleep.

Fang turned off his bedside lamp and stared into the darkness.

So it wasn't love at first sight, just friendship at first sight.

He promised himself that he'd read more of her journal tomorrow.

* * *

><p><strong>Random fact about me: I drink chocolate milk with a spoon. (How's that for weird?)<strong>

**Announcement! I AM NOW A BETA! I'm accepting beta requests!**

**I PROMISE I'll update next week, since I have no school.**

**Can we try for 50 reviews? Please?**

**Luv you all! (In the non-creepy way)**

**Sm:)e! (everyday, all the time)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay. It's official. I AM A DIRECTIONER!** **GO ONE DIRECTION! I love you, Liam, Niall, Louis, Harry, and ZAYN! I am a BIG BIG fan, so if there are ANY DIRECTIONERS OUT THERE, PM me! I'd love to talk! Or just any of you people in general! I love to talk with FanFiction people!**

**On a much darker tone, yes. I know I'm a bitch. I promised to update, like, 3 weeks ago, but there were some unexpected guests and I got LOADED with schoolwork. So I'm sorry. I made the chapter extra long (in my case) to make up for it. I hope you like it!**

* * *

><p>They stayed like that for while, Nudge's arm around Max's shoulders, and Max's head on Nudge's shoulder.<p>

They watched the ocean, even though it was nearly impossible to see it in the dark.

Finally, after an hour, Nudge unwound her arm and shook it, trying to get the feeling back into it.

Max lifted up her head, tear tracks still glittering on her face.

Nudge stared at the tears a bit too long before shaking her head and saying,

"We should probably get back." Max nodded, wiped her nose on the sleeve of her jacket, and stood up.

"Max," Nudge hesitated, wanting to choose her words carefully. "Since we haven't found your journal in the place that it would probably be, we should wait until whoever found it contacts you. You wrote your email address in it right?"

Max nodded again.

"It was in some entry."

Her voice was slightly croaky from the crying.

Nudge tore her eyes away from Max's face, unable to look at her in such a fragile state.

"Well that's good. That way, if somebody finds it, then they can email you and we can come pick it up."

Max nodded mutely and stared over at the ocean, wishing that it could take her away to Narnia, like it had done to Lucy, Edmund, and Eustace in _The Voyage of the Dawn Treader_.

At least in Narnia they got to fight in cool battles on unicorns instead of worrying about their coma-ridden sister.

Nudge's troubled eyes swept over Max, looking for any signs that she wanted to talk, and finding none, she looked at her watch.

Their search hadn't taken long, and since it had been so short, Nudge suggested for them to go back to the hotel and have an early dinner.

They silently trooped back to the hotel, Nudge occasionally looking over at Max, making sure that she didn't break down and get hit by a car.

As much as she wished that the journal would never show up, Nudge hated seeing Max in this empty state.

Even though she wanted to be Max's best friend, she wanted the journal back, just so Max could be the normal girl she had been.

Maybe someone had found it.

Maybe it was a hot guy.

Nudge sure wouldn't mind that.

* * *

><p>As soon as Nudge inserted the card key into the lock into their door and opened the door, Max shoved past her and collapsed on the other double bed next to Valencia's.<p>

Valencia, done with _Pride and Prejudice_ and now reading _Oliver Twist, _looked at Max, then at Nudge, one of her eyebrows raised.

"I'm gonna go downstairs, to the snack bar," Max snuffled. She slid off the bed, grabbed her wallet and walked out the door, her hair flying as she disappeared around the corner.

Nudge smiled sheepishly at Valencia and sat down at the foot of her bed.

Valencia sighed and put down the book.

"Do I really want to know?" Nudge hesitated and started shaking her head, then quickly changed it to a nod.

Valencia looked at her expectantly.

Nudge took a deep breath and everything began to spew out.

"Ok. So the thing is, we looked _everywhere_. We looked on the beach, in your car, the hotel, the beach where we took the pictures, the rose garden, the bench where Max had been writing before, the-,"

Her voice trailed off at the _Get-on-with-it_ look on Valencia's face.

She continued.

"But the thing is, we couldn't find it. And we looked freaking everywhere where it could possibly be!"

Valencia nodded sympathetically. She couldn't imagine what Max must be going through; losing the one thing that wouldn't judge her.

"I see," she said. "What are you going to do now?"

Nudge fell face first on the bed.

"We're just going to have to wait, I guess," she replied, her voice slightly muffled. "Max wrote her email address somewhere in the journal, so we have to hope that someone found it and will try to contact her. They might not read it, and the whole situation might not be so awkward."

She left out the part about her hoping that the person who found it would be a hot guy.

Valencia nodded again.

"Mm hmm. And how did Max take all of this?"

Nudge looked up and sighed.

"Not very well. She actually started to cry."

Valencia dropped the reading glasses she was holding in her hand. They landed silently on the plush light blue carpet

"Excuse me?" she sputtered, not believing what she had just heard. Max, to say in one word, was a wall. She never cried, not even when she had broken her arm in three places, jumping off a swing at her elementary school. She never cried out of happiness, though Valencia suspected she was holding onto that moment for the day when Ella woke up.

"Yeah," Nudge said, turning on her back to look up at the speckled ceiling. "I couldn't believe it either."

Valencia rubbed her eyes with the back of one hand. Her daughter had started crying and she hadn't even been there to comfort her!

"Do you think we should be worried that she's so distraught over an inanimate object?" Nudge asked, looking at Valencia's tired face.

"I don't know," Valencia said, getting off the bed. "All I know is that my daughter, who never sheds a tear, was crying! I need to go talk to her right now!"

She strode towards the door, her head held high. As she made t open the door, Nudge held her back.

"No!" Nudge screeched, unsuccessfully trying to pull her back to the bed. "Max needs her personal time to reflect on the current situation and she needs to weigh her options about what she can do to solve it!"

Valencia stared at her. Nudge blinked twice.

"Come on, Dr. M," she said, a slight pleading tone in her voice. "You know my parents are psychologists."

Valencia gave out a great huff and went back to the bed.

"I suppose you're right," she grumbled. Nudge grinned.

Sometimes she forgot that Valencia could act like such a child.

* * *

><p>Max silently scanned the candy display, ignoring the exasperated voices from the other customers waiting behind her in line.<p>

She looked at each king-sized bar, mentally weighing the pros and cons of each one.

She finally decided on a Kit-Kat, remembering the _Snap-snap-crunch_ from the commercials.

She always liked to do that.

Max brought the candy bar to the register, where the acne-ridden attendant rang it up.

"That's sixty-four cents," he said in a monotone voice, loudly smacking his gum.

Max fished out the change from the pocket of her jacket and took the candy bar over to the tall floor to ceiling window that looked over the garden at the back of the hotel.

It had started to pour since the time that they had come back. It was coming down hard, so her vision of the garden was obscured by dark sheets of rain.

Max thought that it matched her feelings perfectly.

She sat down on the red cushion in front of the window and stretched out her sore legs. Her mouth opened in a large yawn, her jaw slightly cracking.

Max noisily ripped open the wrapper off the candy bar.

_Snap-snap-crunch_. Into her mouth it went.

She suddenly realized that she was ravishing, and loudly scarfed down the rest of her Kit-Kat, dismissing the pointed looks from other people as jealousy.

She really wanted her journal back.

Max usually wrote in it about every four hours, except when she was sleeping. She even brought it to school and wrote under desk during class.

It was almost like she was a cigarette smoker, and her journal was her daily pack of Malbaro. Without it, she felt like she was going to explode from the emotions and feelings welling up inside of her.

She sighed and picked herself off the floor.

The best she could do was wait until whoever found it would return it back to her.

Hoping, of course, that someone _had_ actually found it and that it had not washed into the ocean, or picked up by some unsuspecting seagull.

Max was positive that Nudge wanted it to be a hot guy.

* * *

><p>Max knocked on the hotel room, remembering that she had forgotten her key card. There was quite an amount of shuffling behind the door before it was opened by Nudge, looking slightly frazzled.<p>

She looked at Max in confusion, then reality hit her and she opened the door wider, allowing Max to come in.

"Oh sorry Max! I forgot that you went to the snack bar!" She shut the door behind Max as she came in sat on the other double bed.

"Candy bar," Max corrected. "I changed my mind at the last second. What were you guys doing?"

She saw Nudge and her mother exchange a quick glance before Nudge opened her mouth.

"We were just talking, that's all."

"About what?" Max countered. She was positive they had been talking about her.

They exchanged another glance before Nudge continued,

"Well, we were actually talking about you. And if you're okay about losing your journal."

Point for Max

She stared at the both of them.

"I wasn't at the beginning," Max hesitated before going on. "But I'm okay now, knowing that there's a chance that someone might have found it."

Nudge nodded energetically, and her eyes started to dart around the hotel room.

"I was wondering, since your okay, that we might be able to go back home. I mean, there's not much to do around here anymore, and we only live about forty-five minutes away," she blurted.

Max and Valencia stared at her, until Valencia broke the silence that filled the air and looked Max before replying,

"Well, I suppose we could go back. Nudge _is_ right, we only live forty-five minutes away, so if someone found your journal, we'd be able to come back quickly. I mean, the only reason we stayed in the hotel was because Nudge wanted to."

Max was silent, mentally weighing the options before.

"I suppose, we could go back," Max said slowly. "But just as long we can come back as soon as someone e-mails me saying they've found it."

Nudge's lips broke out into a smile.

"That's great! We can go home in the morning! My hair is getting frizzy without my daily dose of Pantene!" She gave Max a quick hug, and then flew out the door in excitement, yelling something about getting pizza before the door slammed shut behind her.

Valencia got up to sit next to Max and put her arm around Max's shoulder.

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" she questioned. "It must very hard for you to leave the place where your journal might be."

Max gave a weak smile.

"I'll be fine. I just need to distract myself, that's all."

She said the last part to herself, as if she was trying to reassure herself.

Valencia gently squeezed Max's shoulders.

"That's good," she replied consolingly. She got up and headed for the door to make sure Nudge didn't waste the twenty dollars Valencia had slipped her that morning on the candy bar.

She paused before turning the knob and turned to look at Max, who was sitting pitifully on the bed, looking at her shoes.

"You know I want what's best for you, right?" she questioned out.

Max looked up, her brown eyes looking woefully up at her.

"I know Mom," she replied, smiling slightly.

"Good," Valencia said. She paused again.

"I love you, Max," she called.

Max's smile grew wider.

"I love you too, Mom,"

* * *

><p>Fang woke up abruptly, cold sweat running down his face. A stream of pictures leftover from his dream kept running through his head.<p>

_Green pickup ramming into the car. His mom's mouth open in a silent scream. His dad lying in a pool of dark red blood._

He flipped on the bedside lamp and looked at his alarm clock on his bedside table, the glowing red numbers indicating the time. 9:15.

He collapsed back onto his sheets and let out a big breath, blowing some of the long dark hairs off of his sweaty forehead.

His breath came out in pants, as if he had finished running a marathon.

The dream was like reliving the nightmare again. It wasn't the first time he had had the dream. There had been multiple times. When the first one had happened, he had mistakenly told his mother, who dragged to a therapy session with Dr. Knutz, a "renowned psychologist that will surely make you feel on top of the world!"

He never went back again.

Fang stared at the old glow-in-the-dark stars and spaceships that were stuck on his ceiling and refused to come off from the phase in second grade where he had wanted to be an astronaut.

They provided a small sense of comfort. His dad had decorated the room with him, and reliving that memory made it almost seem like he was, well, _here_.

Fang felt tears prick his eyes and hurriedly wiped them away with the back of his hand. He was such a wimp. It was a second time he had cried that day.

He had to get his mind off of things. He looked to where Max's journal was sitting innocently on his table. He mentally debated between reading it and not reading it.

_It's a violation of privacy, _a voice said in his head.

_But it's the only way you'll find out the contact information so you can give it back to her!_ Another voice chimed in.

His hands moved automatically, and the next he knew, the journal was lying in his lap, waiting to be read.

Fang reluctantly turned the well-worn pages to where he had left off.

_It's the only way you'll be able to give it back,_ he reminded himself.

He took a deep breath and began to read.

* * *

><p><em>Dear stupid Journal,<em>

_I have no idea WHY I'm still writing in this, but it sure keeps my mind off of things, so I might as well._

_You're probably wondering who the heck Sam is._

That same feeling that had risen up in Fang's stomach when he had first read Sam's name. But there was no way that he was actually jealous of a guy he had never met. Fang dismissed the feeling as hunger, even though he had just eaten pasta.

_Sam… is probably one of my bestest (yes, I know that's not a word, Journal) friends in the whole world. He distracts me from the sucky things that have been happening. I don't like him like that though. He's got a girlfriend._

The feeling extinguished at once. Okay, so he had been jealous. Who wouldn't be, if a beautiful girl had a friend that was a guy?

_ He's been so supportive throughout the Ella thing. I HAVE to remember to say thanks to him to Nudge. Jeez, I'm being a bitch._

"Hey Fang," a sleepy voice called from Fang's doorway. Fang jumped, knocking Max's journal off his lap to the ground. He looked at the door, ready to kick someone's butt for scaring the crap out of him, only to his younger 15-year old brother, Iggy, staring at him. His blonde hair was sticking out messily and he rubbed his pale blue eyes with the back of his hand.

"Right," Fang said, trying to control himself from his little spaz-out. "Hey. How are you? I haven't seen you since this morning. You eat anything?"

Iggy shrugged. "I'm okay. I haven't haven anything since lunch, so I'm going down to eat now. Did you talk to Mom? She seemed pretty torn-up when you weren't here."

"Yeah. She's fine," Fang replied. They sat in an awkward silence that seemed like forever, until Iggy spoke up.

"That's good. I'll see you tomorrow morning, I guess, since you're probably gonna go to bed," He turned around to head for the stairs, but turned back at the last minute, causing Fang to look up from picking up Max's journal.

"You know that you can tell me anything, Fang, right?" Iggy asked, giving a pointed look at Max's journal. He wasn't a fool; Fang never wrote in journals.

Fang hesitated.

"Yeah. I know."

Iggy nodded.

"It's just that ever since Dad died, we've haven't talked a lot, and I think we should," he continued, a slight plea in his voice.

At that moment, Fang truly understood why Iggy was talking to him. He had been forced to cope with their dad's loss by himself, and Fang, being the butthole that he was, hadn't realized that Iggy was hurting.

"I'm sorry Iggy," Fang said, truly meaning it. "I'll talk with you in the morning. I'd do it now, but it's getting late and I need to get back to something." He pointed at Max's journal.

Iggy nodded and turned around to head downstairs. As soon as his footsteps became distant, Fang picked up Max's journal, turned to the page he had left off of, and began to read.

_I do have the worst memory in the world, though. I'll probably have to decorate my room with post-it notes just to remind me to give Sam and Nudge a simple thanks._

_ How pathetic am I?_

_ I visited Ella again. It's scary how similar a coma-ridded person and a dead person look alike. The doctors refused to tell me if she was getting better or not, so I'm guessing it's the latter._

_ Except it doesn't _feel_ that way. Because we're sisters, I can usually feel when Ella's not doing so well, and vice versa. It doesn't feel like Ella's going to die. I trust myself more than those stupid doctors, so Ella's not going to die. _

_ Simple. As. That._

Fang sucked in a quiet breath. This girl was talking about her sister dying as easily as someone when they were talking about the weather. _What had she gone through?_

_But, Journal, since I'm freaking writing in you and all, I suppose you want to know more about me._

_ My name is Maximum Ariella Ride, Max for short. I have a sister (No freaking duh. I've been rattling on and on all about her "situation" all over these stupid pages), Isabella Annalisa Ride, Ella for short. She's so gullible. One time, when she was in second grade, I told her that she was adopted, and Mom and Dad didn't like to talk about it, and she started sobbing during dinner._

_ I got grounded, as you may have guessed._

Fang smiled in spite of himself.

_ My two bestest buds in the whole world are Nudge and Sam. Sam's got a girlfriend, Cassie, who's probably one of the sweetest girls I have ever met._

_ We have a dog, Total. He's a Scottish terrier, and well, he's a total idiot. He yaps at the cars that are pulling into are driveway and basically TRIES to get run over. He's stupid, but he's very adorable, so we keep him._

_ Hang on, there's someone at the door, lemme go-_

Her writing cut off there, as if whoever had walked into the room had grabbed the journal away.

Fang flipped the page only to see more writing, so he decided to save it for tomorrow. He'd gotten tired.

It was amazing how much he had found about this girl through her journal. Kids at school preferred talking to reading. Fang would have never guessed that somebody poured out their life story onto sheets of paper. Sheets of paper that he had been reading before.

Max seemed to truly love her journal, however much she seemed to deny it in the entries Fang had read.

He hoped, one day, that he could fall in love with somebody. Someone that he could trust; someone he could pour out his feelings to, and not have them laugh at him. Someone that loved him back and truly appreciated him for the person he was. Someone that he could love with his whole heart.

He sure hoped it would be a girl that would be beautiful as Max.

* * *

><p><strong>TA-DA! This chapter may have been lacking action, but the next one won't! So be on the lookout for that! :)<strong>

**Happy St. Patrick's Day!**

**~A sm:)e passes time**

** A sm:)e is a kiss**

** With all the warmth of a hug.**

** This sm:)e is yours, and mine!** **(****StardustAndShadowWings, I thought that was very cute. I hope you don't mind that I used it!)**

**P.S. You guys SEE Messi in that Bayer Leverkusen game? 5 FREAKING GOALS! THAT MAN IS A GOALSCORING MACHINE!**

**REVIEW!**


	7. Chapter 7

**What can I say? I'm a promise breaker. I'm really sorry. This is the first moment I've had in a while were I can sit down, relax and _breathe. _It's a short chapter, but I hope you enjoy. I'm really sorry for updating so late :(.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><em>As Max came closer to Ella, she began to fade. Her smile dropped and look of pure terror replaced it. <em>

_ "Ella!" Max screeched, reaching out her hand. "What's going on? Don't leave me here!" _

_ "Max!" Ella yelled. "Don't leave me! I don't want to die! Please… help me. Don't leave…" _

_ She vanished._

Max awoke with a start, sitting straight up in bed. She was breathing hard.

The sunlight streaming through the windows was bright, too bright. She shut her eyes again, reminding herself that it was all a dream. Just a dream.

She forced her eyes to open, only to find Nudge and her mom in a flurry, moving around the cramped hotel room and throwing clothes into their suitcases.

"Max!" her mother cried out, a tone of relief evident in her voice. "Finally! You wouldn't wake up no matter how hard we tried! Quick, quick, out of bed and get packing. I got an emergency call for a Labrador that apparently needs to get spayed, by me, _right now_."

Max scrambled out of bed, ran a brush through her hair and got packing.

* * *

><p>"HEY I JUST MET YOU! AND THIS IS CRAZY! BUT HERE'S MY NUMBER! SO CALL ME MAYBE! AND ALL THE-"<p>

"Nudge! Would you please shut up! My ears are bleeding from the sound of a cat jumping off the Empire State Building!"

Nudge shut her mouth and then promptly proceeded to hum the stupid song under her breath from the passenger seat.

Max sighed. She unlocked her phone and opened up a new message for Sam.

_Any reports?_

She had to wait a few minutes for him to reply back.

_No. just the usual._

Her mother's eyes met hers in the mirror.

"How's Ella?" she questioned, her voice catching a bit.

"Sam said she's fine, as fine as she can be. But can you just drop me off at the hospital anyway?"

"Sure."

The rest of the car ride was filled with an awkward silence. A silence that Max was sure had never felt so loud.

* * *

><p>The car pulled up in front of the red brick that housed Ella in her comatose state.<p>

Max jumped out of the car and sprinted through the doors, nearly running over the doctors and nurses as she made her way through the hallways to her sister's room on the second floor.

Sam jumped up from his chair when he saw her.

"She's doing alright?" Max asked breathlessly. Sam gave her a lopsided smile.

"Yeah. As fine as she can be." They stood next to each other, gazing at Ella's still body. Then all of a sudden, Max threw her arms around Sam's neck.

"Thanks Sam," she whispered, her voice muffled by his shirt. "For everything. I'm sorry I haven't said it before. I just… I just..."

"Hey," Sam cut her off. "It's alright. I'm happy to help."

They broke apart as the doctor walked into the room. He smiled warmly at them.

"Ah, Miss Ride. Mr. Thomas. So nice of you to come today."

Max huffed with annoyance.

"Look, cut the chitchat. I don't care. Just tell me if anything's wrong with my sister?"

He smiled again.

"Well, no. Nothing new. But we do have a new idea on how to wake her up."

Max instantly perked up.

"What really? You're kidding right? I thought you wanted for her to wake up naturally or some sort of that shit."

The doctor pretended to be unfazed by her language.

"There have been a few cases where doctors planted electrodes deep into the patient's in order to wake them up."

The hope in Max's face instantly dimmed.

"_What_?" Max hissed. "You're going to electrocute my sister's brain? No way in freaking hell! I mean, what are you, crazy? That could-"

Sam cut her off. "Just hear him out Max." The doctor flashed a thank you smile at Sam before continuing.

"As I was saying before, planting electrodes _did_ have an effect on most patients, but not all. To perform this on your sister, we'd need parent or guardian permission as well as an extensive report on her current state of body. Then we'd need final approval from expert doctors if Ella would be ready to have electrodes planted into her brain."

Max was still fuming.

"Alright. I'll talk to my mother about this. But I doubt that she'll want to _fry Ella's brain_." She shot another glare to the doctor, who merely shrugged and left the room.

Max waited for the door to close before letting out a string of curses underneath her breath.

"Hey, hey," Sam laughed. "No need for that. We have a minor in the room." He pretended to cover Ella's ears.

"_I can't freaking believe him!"_ Max whisper shouted. "What the hell is his problem? He's walking around, saying that we can just _fry_ her brain like it's completely normal! It's like strapping her to the electric chair! There's no way in hell that Mom can agree to that!"

Sam looked at her sadly. "But it may be the only way to wake her up."

* * *

><p>"Up and at 'em Fang," a voice outside Fang's room said. A hand began to tap against his door.<p>

Fang opened one eye. It was morning, he realized.

He hated mornings.

He groaned and sat up in bed, stretching his arms up above his head.

"Come on Fang!" Iggy shouted. "It's a new day, too little daylight to waste."

"I'm up, I'm up," Fang grumbled. He found his way out of bed to the bathroom, and after doing his business, he went downstairs to the kitchen.

Iggy was at the table with a platter of chocolate chip pancakes, Fang's favorite, on the table, steam still wafting from the top.

"Wow," Fang blinked, a little stunned. "I haven't eaten your pancakes in a while." Iggy gave a sheepish grin.

"Yeah, well, I guess I was in the mood."

They sat at the table and began to eat as if it were their last meal on Earth. Fang scarfed the pancakes down; desperate to fill the awkward silence that settled into the room.

Iggy finally set down his fork and knife and cleared his throat. Fang looked up.

"Do you remember what you said last night?" Iggy hesitated before continuing. "I just wanted to talk, since we haven't much since Dad died and-,"

Fang reached over and patted his hand.

"It's okay. I'm sorry too. I just left you to cope with it on your own, and I was being a complete jackass. I knew you were hurting and I didn't help."

"It's just…," Iggy's voice broke. "It's just been so hard." The dam blocking the tears tumbled and they began to stream down his face.

Fang got up and went to him, put an arm around him, and hugged him hard.

"It'll be okay," he whispered in his ear. "I'll help you." His own body vibrated slightly as Iggy's body racked with sobs.

"It'll be okay."

* * *

><p>Fang collapsed onto his bed, exhausted from his soccer game with Iggy. He had gotten much better since the last game that they had played, which had caused Fang to run pathetically after him, in a sad attempt to recapture the ball. It wouldn't be long before Iggy turned into the next Lionel Messi.<p>

He was eagerly thinking about the next Iggy were going to spend time together, by playing some video games, when his eyes fell on Max's journal.

Max. Max Max Max. He had never met her before, but felt a deep connection to her, just by reading her journal.

He grabbed the journal, flipped to where he had left off, and began reading.

_Mom took me to see Ella. She's doing about as good as any coma person can do._

_ Jeb tried to visit her but Mom wouldn't have it. She nearly smacked him in the lobby. It took three nurses to hold her off. _

_ My "dad" is an ass. His whole family is an ass. He was supposed to go to jail for a whole year, but his jackass brother bailed him out._

_ And we had always thought that he had no money._

_ Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if Ella had gone to get the groceries instead of me. Ella's a sweetheart. I don't why anyone would get mad at her. _

_ I'm a different story. If I had my way, Jeb would be well on his way to Russia by now. His skin would be peeled off and lemon juice would be poured over it, real slow. His body would be eaten by werewolves._

_ But he's here, skin and body still intact. _

_ I wish I could kill him._

If Fang was the type of person to gasp, he would have. But he wasn't. She talked about killing her father so… simply. As if she had all the different ways planned out. But, judging by the avid lemon juice description, she probably did.

_If anyone does something to Ella, they deserve to die. Slowly and painfully, to feel the pain that Ella, Mom, and I suffer through every day._

_ Go die in a fucking hole Jeb._

_ …_

_ I honestly can't believe I used that type of language. I guess I was caught up in the moment. It's in pen so it'll always be there._

_ Yay._

_ I wrote a poem in English class the other day. I'll just copy it down here._

The storm rages on.

The trees crash and fall.

Her eyes shed the unseen tears.

The pain is raw

The one she loves falls.

The rain lets up.

The rain shines through.

The tears are dried.

Her smile returns.

_That's freaking beautiful right?_

_ I speak the language of Sarcasm. Get used to it._

_ Ella is my rainbow. If she never wakes up, I won't deserve to be happy, because her life is gone and I'm still here._

_ If she wakes up, I've got her back._

_ She's going to wake up._

_ I should probably write some contact info, right Journal? If I lose this, then whoever finds it is going to have to know how to return it._

Fang's heart stopped beating, due to the fact that right there, in neon green ink, was what he had been searching for; what had been his original purpose for opening this book.

Her e-mail address was carefully written in neat handwriting.

* * *

><p><strong>I have the best readers in the world. I <em>really really<em> love you guys. Your reviews/comments after I posted the A/N made me want to write right away. And I tried. Then I ran out of time, got homework, blah blah blah. The thing is, I had the ending of this figured out before the real plot formed. I'm doing my best right now, but I apologize if some things don't flow as well as they should.**

**Thanks for all your wonderful reviews and keep doing what you're doing!  
><strong>

**P.S. I haven't read _Nevermore_ yet, so don't ruin it for me, but I realized that the whole reason why I'm going to read it is because I want to know if Max and Fang get together. I honestly don't care about the whole "saving the world" shit. Anyone with me?  
><strong>

**I'll try and update as soon as I can!  
><strong>

**See ya!  
><strong>

**~Grace  
><strong>


	8. Chapter 8

**Never fear, Amazing Grace1019 is still here! It's just that I wasn't feeling my old username so I changed it. It's still me! You can still call me Grace, I don't mind. **

**It's been too long, hasn't it? My sincere apologies! My pathetic excuse is that _Nevermore_ completely butchered my inspiration for this story.** **I had planned on finishing this story over the summer, but seeing as school starts in two weeks, I don't see that happening. Hopefully I'll be able to finish before the end of the year.**

**Enjoy reading! xx.**

* * *

><p>"You're kidding me, right?" Max exclaimed. "Are you seriously considering doing this to her?"<p>

Valencia sighed and rubbed her eyes.

"All I'm saying," she began to wipe the kitchen counters with a dishcloth. "is that this may be our only choice. There may not be other options to try in the future. Do you mind putting the chicken in the oven while I go and take a shower?"

Max bristled, being harshly reminded that this was what Sam had told her in the hospital.

"So you're seriously thinking about _frying_ Ella's brain?" Valencia let out another deep sigh.

"When you say it like that, you make me seem like a horrible mother." Max let out a frustrated groan at her mother's attempt to guilt her into agreeing to do this.

"How do you even know that there's even a chance that she'll wake up? The doctor didn't even tell me if there was any guarantee!" Valencia spun around, her eyes flashing.

"I'll ignore what you just said, Max, because I know that you love your sister and would do anything to get her to wake up. I've done some research on this procedure, and there's usually a pretty good chance for people to wake up."

"Pretty good? I'd rather have a procedure that's a one hundred percent guarantee!"

Valencia took Max's hands in her own. "There is no one hundred percent guarantee Max, you have to understand that. The longer that a person stays in a coma, the less of a chance they have of waking up. She's been... sleeping... for two weeks and there's been no response. Don't you think that we should at least try?"

Max silently weighed her options. Try something that may work or let Ella continue on in her comatose state, which may or may not continue on forever? She finally came to a decision.

"All right. I'll let them do it. But you're sure that it won't do too much damage?" Valencia's face broke out into a huge grin and she hugged Max.

"Yes I'm sure. Oh this is wonderful Max! Ella might be finally coming home!" She existed the kitchen and headed towards the stairs. "Don't forget to put that chicken in."

Max stayed behind, not really liking the 'might' in her mom's last sentence. She stared at the floor, remembering every wonderful thing about Ella. She certainly deserved to wake up, but using such a risky procedure? Max wasn't too sure about doing that.

She decided to tell Sam, Nudge, and Cassie about the plan. Max was sure that they would be able to convince her mother to consider less risky options.

She put the chicken in the oven to bake and went out the door.

* * *

><p>"So she actually agreed to it?" Sam exclaimed. Max numbly nodded, still in shock from the conversation with her mother. Sam whistled quietly and ran his fingers through his brown hair.<p>

"Wow," he sighed. "I know that I said that this might be our only option, but I didn't think that she would actually agree to it."

"Me neither," Max said. "I mean, she's only been in this for two weeks, so there's still a good chance for her to wake up, right?"

Cassie, who was sitting on the other side of Sam, shook her head.

"What do you mean no?" Max said, her voice starting to rise. Cassie sighed.

"I'm not saying that there's no chance for her to wake up, but as everyday goes by, her chances get slimmer and slimmer. Sorry, Max, but I agree with your mom. The electrode thing is probably your best bet. I've read about people who've done it and the patients usually wake up."

"But it's the 'usually' and the 'might' that everyone keeps on saying that's making me back off! What if it doesn't work, huh? What if she's stuck in the coma forever and we have to pull the plug? What if her brain gets fried? What if-," Max's voice was cut off by Cassie's.

"If she doesn't wake up from it, then she'll have no permanent damage done to her brain. The doctors plant the smallest amount of electrodes into the patient's brain. Enough to get everything moving, but not enough to 'fry her brain,'" Cassie explained, using quotes for the last few words.

Max huffed. She had been determined to convince everyone to not go through with the procedure, but it seemed her plan was failing. _Badly_.

Nudge spoke up from her spot next to Max.

"I, personally, think that you should go through with this Max. I don't think that you have that much to lose."

"Yeah, only the chance that Ella's brain might actually never be the same again," Max bit back. She still couldn't get the thought that Ella might not be the same if she woke up.

Cassie let out a frustrated sigh.

"Damn it Max, why don't you understand? Even if she doesn't wake she will. Be. _Fine_. How many times do I need to say that?"

"Alright alright!" Max gave up. If both her mom and Cassie, the smartest person she knew, both thought that the procedure wouldn't do much damage, then it probably wouldn't. However hesitant Max was, she knew that she would have to put it away, for Ella's sake.

"So you've decided? The doctor's are going to do it?" Sam questioned.

"I guess so... it does seem like her only option. But just because Mom and I both agreed to it doesn't mean that the doctor's can automatically go through with it. She needs to have a thorough medical examination, to make sure that putting in the electric things won't hurt any other part of her."

"See, Max? They aren't going to even put the electrodes in unless they're absolutely sure that it won't result in a disaster. She'll be _fine_." Cassie interjected, an "I told you so" look forming on her face.

Max huffed. She wasn't willing to admit defeat, but figured that it would be the only way to get everyone off her back.

"All right, all right. The doctors will do the procedure. But keep in mind that I'm only doing this for Ella's sake, _not_ because you cruel people bullied me into it."

Nudge, Sam, and Cassie all grinned at each other and exchanged high fives.

"I knew that we would be able to get her to do it!" Nudge exclaimed. Max raised her eyebrows and Nudge's mocha skin flushed. "I mean, excellent choice Max. You'll see, this will be good for Ella."

Max gave her a hard stare but let loose a smile of her own. "Good choice of words, Nudge."

* * *

><p>"And this is your final decision?" Doctor Thompson questioned. Valencia nodded fervently.<p>

"Yes. I, I mean, we," she gestured to herself and Max. "are quite sure that this will be Ella's best option."

The doctor nodded in agreement. "Good choice, Ms. Ride. To be honest, if you hadn't chosen that option, I may have bugged you and kept on nagging until you decided to go through with it."

Valencia raised an eyebrow and Max just openly stared at Doctor Thompson. He gave them a small grin.

"That may seem slightly cruel, but it really is the best option for Ella." His face quickly turned serious. "I've already done an examination of her body, and she is ready to have the operation today."

"_Today_?" Max asked incredulously. "Are you sure you want it to be so soon? Maybe you can wait a few weeks or something."

The doctor gave her a look and sighed.

"Look, Max, I know you're wary of this operation and you aren't sure if it's the best choice, but I'm telling you, it is. I'm sorry to say it, but Ella's current state of health is rapidly deteriorating. If the electrodes aren't placed within the next few days, then the chances that she will wake up become _very _slim. As the days continue on, her luck-and our luck-diminishes."

Max was silent for a few moments. Valencia gently placed her hand on Max's arm.

"I'm waiting for you to make the final call on this, Max," she whispered.

Max looked up at the doctor.

"All right. You can do the operation."

* * *

><p>Fang had been staring at the neatly written email address for a pure five minutes before shaking his head to bring him out of his stupor.<p>

He ought to email her and return the journal to Max. It was the right thing to do. But, at the same time, _he didn't want to_. It was unbelievably wrong of him to do so since Max had basically stated that the journal was a big part of her world. And now he was depriving her of the thing that she needed the most. Wasn't that torture or something?

There had to be some maniac explanation for his feelings. Perhaps he simply wanted to know more about her. Fang had always been a naturally curious person. It made sense that he was drawn to a new individual.

Or maybe there was another reason. Maybe… he liked her. Fang nearly choked on his saliva when the thought crossed his mind. How could he possibly like someone just by reading their journal?

But he had to accept it. It was the only thing he could think of. So there it was. Fang couldn't send the email because he liked Max. He liked her alot.

However, Fang knew that he had to send the email. It was the right thing to do. He sighed, picked himself off of his bed, and made his way over to the laptop that was sitting on his desk.

As he sat himself into his chair, the bedroom door opened and Iggy poked his head into Fang's room. Fang looked up at him, a quizzical look on his face.

"I was wondering if you were up to another round of soccer. A chance to redeem your honor," Iggy smirked. Fang smiled.

"Sure. Just let me send a quick email and I'll meet you outside in five minutes, okay?"

Iggy nodded and shut the door behind him as he exited the room.

Fang let out a hiss of air and opened up his inbox in Chrome. He drew up a new email, typed in Max's email address, and began to compose.

_Hi Max…._

* * *

><p><strong>I apologize for the shortness of Fang's part and the overall shortness of the chapter. Writing this was like trying to walk through a pool of molasses. I know that everything seems to be rushed and Fang seems to be falling for Max way too quickly. I didn't want to draw this out too long, there's only so much journal reading that one can take. I also hadn't originally planned for this story to be too lengthy. I'm thinking two more chapters? Thanks for sticking with me, even though I definitely don't update enough. <strong>

**I've thrown myself into the mystical and scary world of tumblr, so if you want to follow me... my URL is zazima**

**Love you all!**

**Rain xx.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Um, hey guys. I'm back?**

**No amount of apologies will ever be good enough. I am _SO _sorry about the unacceptable wait. I've just had so much to do, one hell of a bout of writer's block that lasted over a year, and absolutely no motivation to write for this. But everything's gotten much better, and I was able to write and upload this chapter, no matter how painful it got sometimes. Turns out all I needed was a good playlist and a few hours to just sit down and write.**

**You guys probably don't even care and just want to read the damn chapter, which is absolutely understandable. **

**Enjoy the chapter, my wonderful readers (if there are any of you left)!**

**Warning: There is extreme OOCness in this chapter. Sorry, but it had to happen!**

* * *

><p>Max was restless.<p>

She couldn't stop moving. Her leg jumped up and down while her fingers drummed against her denim clad thighs. Her eyes darted across the room, her gaze switching from the round table cluttered with dated magazines, to the fluorescent light hanging dismally from the ceiling, until it finally settled on her mother, who was the epitome of calm at the moment.

Dr. Valencia Martinez was merely sitting on the cushioned chair of the waiting room, the only occasional movements being the rustle of pages being flipped in her _People _magazine.

Max wondered how the hell she could do it. Ella was lying on a cold metal table right now, getting electric currents run through her brain.

At least the receptionist sympathized with her. She gave Max a small smile.

"Would like to use a computer? We have a room down the hall."

_Thank God. _Max stood up and exited the waiting room, going in the direction that the receptionist had pointed to. She collapsed into the chair in front of a monitor and impatiently shook the mouse.

'_I wonder if they'd let me download League of Legends on this?' _Max's thoughts wandered to the epic tournament she had played in last week as the computer booted up.

She had completely kicked Sam's ass, and it had felt pretty damn good. But the receptionist probably would not enjoy the shouts and curses that would come from the room if Max downloaded the game, so she decided to check her email instead.

As soon as she logged in, her eyes went wide. _Wow_, there were a lot of messages. She skimmed the screen impatiently.

_Spam, spam, spam, college emails aren't too important yet right?_

Just as she was about to log out, her eyes caught a message near the top of the screen.

"I found your journal" read the subject in bright bold letters.

All the breath in Max's lungs went out in one big _swoosh_.

_What the hell?_

Her fingers scrambling for the mouse, she eventually managed to select the message. Her leg jiggled uncomfortably as the computer took _way too freaking long_ to load the message.

As soon the words appeared on the screen, her eyes hungrily gobbled up the script that was displayed.

_Hi Max._

_My name is Fang Ride. I live in Cape Cod. About a week ago, I found your journal on a bench by the beach._

_Don't kill me, but I read some of it in order to find some contact information so I could get your journal back to you as soon as possible._

_Assuming you live somewhat close to me, I'll be at the said bench on Tuesday at around 4 pm with your journal._

_Hopefully you can make it._

_Sincerely,_

_Fang Cochran_

Max sagged back against the wooden back of the chair and tried to wrap her head around everything she had just read.

First of all, who the hell had the name _Fang?_ He was probably some sort of weird punk rock kid that listened to screamo music and smoked pot in parks after dark.

And who did he think he was, reading her journal like that? The guy clearly did not have any girls in his life, otherwise he would have known not look into someone's personal thoughts.

But all uncertainties aside, Max had a decision to make. Should she go and meet him?

Today was Sunday, and Ella's operation was going to be over soon. Max had no idea if she would be willing to leave Ella to meet up with this Fang kid, even if it only took a couple of hours or so.

Max let out a long breath. It had to be done. She began writing a reply to the weird kid's email.

As soon as she finished, she hit the send button without any hesitation, not wanting to get cold feet about the whole situation.

She heard footsteps and her head whipped towards the door, only to see her mother, who had a weak smile plastered on her face and her eyes filling with tears.

_Oh gosh something must have happened to Ella._

She leapt to her feet, and in her haste, she knocked over the computer chair. It fell to the floor with a loud _crash_ that overlapped the words that flew out of her mouth.

"What is it? Is Ella okay? Tell me!"

Her mom wrapped Max into a hug. "Nothing's wrong sweetie." Max lifter her head from where it was resting on her mom's shoulder.

"Then what's wrong?"

Her mother let out a shaky breath. "Ella's awake."

* * *

><p>Fang couldn't help himself. As soon as Iggy was done kicking his ass in another soccer game, he immediately went up into his room and turned on his laptop. He knew he was being unrealistic, he had only emailed Max half an hour ago.<p>

Which was why he was quite surprised when a new message from Max was innocently waiting in his inbox.

"Wow," he muttered under his breath. "This girl works fast." Or maybe he had caught her in the right moment at the right time.

He held his breath as he clicked on the message, and he when he read it, it went all out in one _swoop_.

_Fang,_

_I've decided to ignore all the warning bells that are going off in my head right now. You may or may not be a creepy pothead, but I _do_ want my journal back. _

_I'll meet at the bench this Tuesday_

_Max_

Fang slumped against his chair; the simple message seemed to take out any and all remaining breath in his body, yet his heart continued to race.

Why the hell was he so nervous?

Fang swallowed hard, clicked the reply button, and began to compose his response.

* * *

><p>Max couldn't breathe.<p>

It felt like the devil had sucker punched her right in the sternum, knocking the wind out of her.

As soon as her brain caught up with the words that had come out of her mother's mouth, Max began to greedily gulp mouthfuls of air into her shocked body.

"Max?" her mother asked worriedly. "Are you alright?" Max shook her head. Her mom walked over to her and began to soothingly run circles on her lower back with her hand.

A few moments passed before Max spoke.

"Take me to her. Now." Her voice shook with the emotion that was overriding senses. Dr. Martinez nodded, took Max by the hand, and led her out of the computer room towards the one that housed Ella. As they approached the door that led to Ella's room, Max immediately stopped in her tracks. Her mother looked at her questioningly.

"I just need… to compose myself. Just for a sec. Please," Max looked at her mom pleadingly. Dr. Martinez nodded numbly, not used to hearing the word "please" slip out of her oldest daughter's mouth. It was understandable, Dr. Martinez's legs had gotten shaky when she had heard the Ella had woken up; she could only imagine what Max must be feeling.

Max drew a few deep breaths, trying to slow down her racing heartbeat. _Oh gosh Ella._ Her baby sister, the one that she had taught to ride her bike, blow bubbles into her chocolate milk. Ella was the one that biked Max, precariously perched on the handlebars of her bright pink bike, to the hospital when Max had fallen out of a tree and broken her arm.

Ella was the one that had given Max advice on any occasion. Ella was her freaking conscience.

And here she was, less than ten feet away, awake and breathing after getting the crap beaten out of her by her asshole of her father.

Why the hell was Max still standing outside?

As the realization dawned on her, Max pushed past her mother, who let out a little squeak of surprise at the sudden action, and entered the room.

And there, sitting up on the hospital, her hair pushed back, her eyes bright and _open_, and all ten fingers and toes still intact, was her baby sister.

Ella smiled brightly at sudden intrusion into her room.

"Hiya Maxie," she whispered. Max let out a strangled sob.

"Ell-Bell," she croaked out. She rushed towards her sister and wrapped her arms around her small frame. Ella let out a little _oof!_, causing Max to promptly pull back from the hug, her arms still around Ella's shoulders. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" Max questioned, her words falling over each other in her haste to get them out and her eyes frantically searching Ella's face for any discomfort. Ella smiled warmly.

"Nah, I'm fine. Just didn't expect you to actually hug me. Thought you were Miss No Chick Flick Moments, right?" Ella lightly teased, only in a way Ella could. Max returned a watery smile.

"Ella, there's no way in hell I _wouldn't_ be able to hug you after you were stuck in a freaking coma for two weeks," Max stated matter-of-factly. She immediately wrapped her arms around Ella and tugger her close. "God, I missed you so much," she whispered into Ella's hair.

"Yeah, yeah. Coma, you missed my amazing presence in your life, I get it," Ella said jokingly, pushing away from Max after a few moments. "Right now, I _do_ want to get a hug from my mom."

"Oh yeah," Max chuckled. Their mother settled alongside the two girls on the hospital and wrapped Ella into her embrace.

"I'm so glad you're okay." Max heard her mother whisper. When she pulled back and all three females were wiping their eyes and sniffling.

"I've cried more in the past few weeks than I have in my entire lifetime," Max admitted as she accepted a tissue that Valencia offered her.

"Just because of me? Aw, Maxie, I'm honored," Ella grinned. Max shook her head.

"Not just you, Ell-Bell. I lost my journal and it kinda shook me up," Max revealed. Ella frowned.

"Since when do you keep a journal? I thought that you were all for bottling up your feelings and only speaking about them after I've pestered you for three weeks." Max shook her head and promptly launched into the events of Ella's aftermath. Ella's eyes widened as she soon as she finished.

"Wow, crying in front of Nudge. That must have been pretty traumatic for her."

"Ah, shut up," Max lightly punched Ella in the arm. "Someone actually emailed me this morning, telling me that they found it." Ella squealed.

"Ooh, do tell!" This led Max to tell Ella about the mysterious "Fang" character that had contacted. Ella waggled her eyebrows.

"Maybe he's this tall, dark, handsome, boy that secretly pines for you after reading you innermost secrets." Max snorted.

"Doubt it, Ella. He's probably a weird kid that grows pot and still lives in his mom's house." Ella frowned.

"But you have to go! It's your journal. I'll even come with you if you want."

"Absolutely not," Valencia finally spoke up. She looked at Max. "You should go, Maxie. I know your journal is important to you. Just be careful, okay?"

Max looked at the two most important people in her life sitting in front of her. Their presence made the uneasiness of the situation go away and her confidence returned.

"Okay. I'll go."

* * *

><p>Two days based by quickly, and before Fang knew it, it was three o'clock on Tuesday and Fang was making the five minute trek towards the bench on the beach where everything had happened.<p>

He was early, he knew it, but he wanted some time to read some more of Max's journal before it was taken from him by Max herself. He had barely read any of it, the journal was filled to its brim whilst Fang had only managed to read about five pages.

When he reached the weather beaten bench, he plopped down, removed the journal from his battered backpack, opened it, and began to read.

_Is it bad to wish that my mom and Jeb had never met? I mean sure, it would mean that me and Ella would have never been born, and therefore I would never have been able to meet Nudge, Sam, and Cassie, but it would also mean that Ella would have never gotten beaten up by Jeb and gotten put into a coma._

_Ella doesn't deserve to have a finger be put on her by that son of a bitch, let alone a complete beating._

Fang winced at the crude language that Max used to describe Jeb. It was clear that her hatred for him ran deep and strong.

_My grades are going down the drain. Nudge is trying to help get them back up by "persuading" me with Twix bars, but I _just. Don't. Care.

_As long as Mom doesn't find out, I'm in the clear. She may have helped me get out of the weird slump I was in by giving this dumb journal, but there's no way she'd be able to bring my grades by handing me another one. She'd probably hire a tutor, and that's the last frigging thing I need_.

_I went to visit Ella in the hospital today, and the doctor's said that she's doing really well. I guess I am happy for that news, but I'm just wondering why the hell she's not well enough to wake up and talk to me. _

_People are trying to be all nice to me at school. I don't know how they found out about Ella, since I don't say anything during school, so it must have been Nudge and her big blabbermouth. Brigid didn't even make fun my "lame ass clothes" yesterday, which is a big step for her. What does she even get out of making fun of my clothes and hair anyway? It's not like her's are any better._

Fang felt a fierce wave of protectiveness wash over him at the thought of Max getting bullied. She didn't deserve any of that shit. All in all, it seemed that Max actually had the suckiest life that Fang had ever heard of. An abusive father and a sister in a coma? Damn, that blowed. And that was coming from the kid whose dad had died in a car crash and whose mom was spiraling into depression.

_Sam took me out to go laser tagging with him and Cassie the other day. _

Fang tried to ignore the stab of jealousy that flashed through him. They were best friends, right?

_It felt really awkward, since they were supposed to be having a date. They kept on being "adorable" between games and were just… really…. agh! I can't explain it._

_I guess that why Nudge is always complaining about having to third wheel. _

_I don't know, journal. Seeing Sam and Cassie together made me really wish that I had something like that. A relationship I guess. They're really cute together._

_Oh God, what the hell is happening to me? I'm turning into Brigid! Next thing you know I'll be wearing Uggs, drinking frappuccinos, and _-

A hand that was suddenly on his shoulder broke Fang out of his bubble. He whirled around and his eyes were filled with the sight of-

_Max_.

There in the flesh was the gorgeous girl from the picture. The brown hair with the blonde streaks, the heart shaped face. The photo didn't do her justice. Every detail was magnified and Fang hungrily drunk in the features of her face.

Except, this time, unlike her picture, Max's eyes were filled with suspicion and anger, and her full lips were curved into a frown.

"What the hell, dude? Were you just reading my journal? That's private business!" Her voice, though filled with malice, was just… Fang didn't know how to describe it, except as lovely. His thoughts were consumed with Max for a few moments before he realized that Max was impatiently snapping her fingers in front of his face.

"Hello? Are you deaf as well as plain old stupid?" she snapped. Fang shut his mouth (_when had it fallen open?) _and tried to form words.

"I… I just…," he stammered, voice faltering at the sight of Max's face. "I just wanted to find out who you were," he finished lamely. Max raised her eyebrows at him.

"Considering you contacted me two days ago, I'm assuming you already knew who I was. Now tell me. _Why were you reading my journal?_"

Damn this girl was terrifying.

"You're… you're interesting," he managed to force out. The anger swarming Max's face immediately washed away at this words a curious look replaced it instead.

"Huh," she said, scanning him head to toe. Fang shrank back a little at her inspection. When she was finished, she held out her hand and waggled her fingers.

"Come on. Hand it over," she demanded.

"Oh, yeah," Fang mumbled. He shut the journal and handed it over to her. Their fingers brushed, and even though it was so so cliche, Fang could have sworn that he felt a spark or two at the contact.

Max shoved the notebook into her backpack and turned back. They stood like that, facing each other, for a few uncomfortable moments before Fang cleared his throat. Max jumped a little at the sudden sound.

"Do you… do you want to go get some ice cream?" Fang asked. "I promise I'm not a serial killer of a kidnapper of anything," he hurriedly added as he saw Max's eyes widen.

Max scanned his face, as if searching for something, for what he didn't know (maybe for the prospect of a serial killer or a kidnapper in his eyes), before speaking up.

"I don't know, that is something a serial killer or a kidnapper would say," she said absentmindedly, her eyes still studying Fang's face.

Her face suddenly broke out into a small smirk. "I am, however, an excellent judge of character, and you don't look like a serial killed or a kidnapper. Too tall. And you eat ice cream at the end of November" Fang grinned back at her, feeling the instant chemistry between them.

"I know a place," he exclaimed, unable to contain the excitement that was flooding his body.

"Great," Max announced. "Lead the way."

* * *

><p><strong>I know, I know. I'm leaving you guys with such awful cliffhangers. <strong>

**I'm not going to promise a date as to when the next (and final) chapter will be up, since I know I would be able to stick with it, but I _do _promise that the wait won't be as long as it was for this chapter.  
><strong>

**Thank you so much for sticking with me this whole time. It means so much to me and I appreciate lots! **

**Love you guys,**

**Rain xx.**

**(Reviews would be great, even though I definitely don't deserve them for leaving you guys for so long)**


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